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4 Years! And I wish…

Today I celebrate 4 years being cancer free. Such a bizarre thing to even say. I am not the same person I was before my diagnosis. I will never be “her” again. I often think about that and wish I could go back, to the me I was before. It’s a silly, childish wish. But a wish, nonetheless.

And I often wish I didn’t know what I know now. Wish I didn’t know the harm in our environment, our products, our everyday lives … Wish I could blindly live my life, thinking IT won’t happen to me, or my friends, or my family.

I wish I didn’t know so many people with cancer… I wish these new diagnoses would stop. I wish my heart would stop breaking with each new diagnosis.

But I do know, and they keep coming.

We are in the thick of it, this cancer… it is not going away. It will continue to affect countless people. It will continue to break hearts.

This is NOT normal. This is NOT ok.

Look at the research, read the studies. The links to cancer are there… our environment, these toxins in the plastics and elsewhere, our conveniences… they are affecting our genetic makeup.

I don’t care if you are Republican, or Democrat. I don't care if you believe in climate change or not. I don't care about the buzz words that get us all worked up and create walls. I don’t give a shit what you are. I don’t care how you get there. I don't care… get beyond proving points and get there! Make small changes… I want this hurt to stop for us all

I am in remission but carrying cancer is a heavy word. It doesn’t go away… that word lingers & whispers more often than I'd like. I am so thankful to be where I am… but I do wish none of this happened… and I am worried for our world. I am worried for what is to come and what we have to walk through until eyes open.

As much as I hate cancer, what I can thank it for, is making it clear as day, what matters… which is actually not that much… Being kind, having compassion, giving a shit… those things matter.

And today, on what I consider my 4 years being cancer free … I’ll celebrate…

but I’ll also say with every fiber of my being ...


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